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February 28, 2009

Fred the Shred

The Sun tracks down Fred the Shred and asks him the most important question about his pension:

 WORLD’S worst banker Sir Fred Goodwin was left stunned last night when The Sun tracked him down and demanded: �Surely you can get by on less?� The Royal Bank of Scotland fat cat has outraged Brits by raking in �693,000 a year as he starts drawing on his �25million pension. .......Sun man David Willetts read out our petition, saying: �Our readers have a message for you — ‘Dear Fred The Shred, I am in the red so I want back my bread, surely you can get by on less instead’.� We then asked �Do you have any comments to make about that?� Flummoxed Sir Fred failed to defend his bumper pension as his dogs made a din in the background. Fred The Shred — who presided over the biggest corporate cock-up in British history — said: �I don’t have any comments to make at this stage David and thank you very much for calling.�

Well, yes, but it is true that a government minister signed off on his taking early retirement and thus getting his pension now....rather than being fired. The effects of his taking early retirement were in fact spelled out and the Minister knew this back in October. He just failed to tell anyone else about it.

The Daily Mash is good on this though:

AHA ha ha ha ha ha ha, aha ha ha, aha ha ha ha ha, former Royal Bank of Scotland chief executive Sir Fred Goodwin said last night.

The disgraced banker spoke out while bent over double in an Edinburgh street, slapping his knee as his cheeks took on a deep, rosy pink colour.

Becoming light-headed, he was then forced to crouch down with his head buried in his hands while his shoulders began to jiggle uncontrollably.

Minutes later the 50 year-old pensioner stood up and attempted to compose himself before his face erupted once again and he began waving frantically as if to stay, 'no, stop, stop, I can't take it any more'.

About right you might think.

February 28, 2009 in Finance | Permalink


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