Which Star?

Enquiring minds want to know, who was this star?

MYSTERY surrounds the identity of the A-list Hollywood celebrity who is said to have committed a lewd sex act in what must be one of the few above-board massage parlours in Scotland.

The star was having his tensions eased at an upmarket hotel spa after watching a pro-celebrity golf tournament at St Andrews.

The masseuse was attending to the knotted muscles of his neck and head when further down the fairway, she alleges, he whipped off his modesty towel and played an extra stroke or two. His grip was good, both on himself and the masseuse’s wrist, but his address to the ball was rushed and he was well above par without even holing out.

The masseuse complained to her employers at the Old Course hotel, was eventually dismissed and has now taken her case to an employment tribunal in Dundee.

“It was disgusting,” she told the hearing yesterday. “Even though he was a Hollywood superstar, I couldn’t believe he thought he could get away with something like that.”

The star was said to have been on holiday with his wife in the Fife seaside town to watch the Dunhill Links championship. He cannot be named for legal reasons, which will send the curious scurrying to the internet in the hope of tracking down a leak.

Any ideas?

Update, from Matthew in the comments. Any advance on Michael Douglas?

Ah, Kevin Costner then.