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August 05, 2005

Message to Suicide Bombers.

Just a small thought, a tip if you wish. As you go through your training at the suicide bombing school, fit yourself with that expanding waistcoat, pack your rucksack for the last trip, think on what it is that you will be getting. Those 72 virgins (I’ll assume that the translation is correct and it isn’t raisins you’re after).

I’d just like you to reconsider, think for a moment. Lovely woman though she is are you absolutely certain, totally convinced, that you wish to spend eternity with 72 of these:


(Note for those who may not be quite au fait with the details of British politics.  Anne Widdicombe  is a Conservative MP, former Minister and the country’s most famous virgin.)

August 5, 2005 in Islamists | Permalink


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Man, talk about your downers.... [Read More]

Tracked on Aug 5, 2005 1:30:00 PM


Has the delectable Ann actually volunteered for the process, or are you utilising a rather snide photo for debate purposes only?

From my own rather limited knowledge of the lady in question, the would-be martyrs would get rather short shrift from Miss Widdecombe!

Posted by: Mike Cunningham | Aug 5, 2005 10:31:02 AM

Mike, methinks you missed the point. This particular photo was obviously chosen because it exudes the sheer charm and s*xiness of the virgin in question.

Posted by: bryan | Aug 5, 2005 11:24:04 AM

Virgin? That looks more like a rasin to me.

Fits my prefered translation fine.

Posted by: Chris harper | Aug 5, 2005 1:05:56 PM

Comming from a different angle - when a suicide bomber commits suicide his body is left on earth - it is his spirit that goes to paradise. In this paradise the virgins must also be spirits. Without bodies the delights offered may be very different from those conjured up in their imagination.

Are these young men being hoodwinked into believing there will be unlimited sex when they reach paradise

Posted by: Ed Derbyshire | Aug 5, 2005 1:43:44 PM

But virgin is a temporary state is it not? Can you have a used virgin? If one is used do you get a replacement, or are you down to 71. Eternity can last awhile you know. Who is in charge of virgin supply and demand in Allahland. With all the current business is there a shortage. Will you have to wait for yours, or take 51 and get an IOU for 21. Will there be any left for the next generation of martyrs.

Beginning to sound like Social Security. Don't know that I'd trust it.

Posted by: ronnie | Aug 5, 2005 7:52:50 PM

As my buddies and I say: not with a stolen dick.

Posted by: Timothy | Aug 5, 2005 8:20:23 PM

What a woman!

Posted by: Alex | Aug 5, 2005 9:49:28 PM

Ah now Time. That's mean!

Posted by: pdberger | Aug 5, 2005 10:13:41 PM

Tim, you're spoiling us today ;)

Posted by: rjw | Aug 5, 2005 11:17:23 PM

Well, thinking about it, she does seem to fit both translations.

Ed & Ronnie,

The Koran or the Hadiths, one or the other and can't remember which and don't care enough to do the research, are quite explicit about the whole thing, pornographic really. The quality of the males orgasm is described (a man experiencing this intensity on earth would faint), his endurance is enhanced (all night, EVERY night) (haven't done that since I was much younger) and the ladies virginities are always restored the next day. Doesn't sound like a terribly spiritual place to me.

The problem I have always had, isn't virginity as much a state of mind as much as physical intactedness? (intactedness ???, so much for my english usage). Do they forget what happened the previous night? If so, does that mean the bloke has to spend every night teaching them anew? Is paradise really just an eternity of him trying to overcome their ignorant and fumbling ineptitude?

Frankly, after the first quarter of eternity I would probably be ready to swap the whole thing for a decent rasin.

Give me a troop of experienced wenches any day.

Posted by: Chris harper | Aug 6, 2005 1:29:10 AM

Agreed Chris... I think you'd get a bit worn down after only half an eternity.

However, I'm really edified to know that virginity can be restored in heaven. Who'd have guessed.

But... what if she gets uh.. with angel or something.

Posted by: ronnie | Aug 6, 2005 4:04:58 AM

Dear All,
The concept of Paradise is different as describe by muslim world or media.
As for Cartoon goes, I think it's not a good
practice(way) to show(express) comedy which hurt so
many people.
One more thing Sucide(killing yourself) is prohibeted in Islam also killing of any other
human being is also striclly forbidden.
for furthur information about Jihad please visit

Posted by: Rehman Mohar | Feb 3, 2006 4:24:54 AM