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August 14, 2005

Caroline Collen.

Joy unconfined! This blog appears to have a new fan. A certain Caroline Collen writes from Doha in Qatar to give her critical appraisal of my efforts:

Well Tim,
Apart from having the same name as my husband - why on earth have I found you on the internet.  Simply boring.  We are moving to Mauritius as my husband is from this wonderful island and thought I should look up as much info as possible and lo and behold your website came up and yes as I have already stated what makes you so special as I was simply bored.
Maybe you have visited Mauritius and maybe you have not, but you need to get out there Tim and embrace what life is on offer because your web site whoever did it for you should be shot - hope you did not spend a lot of money on it but if you did it yourself then no worries.
Don't get me wrong are you a writer then even worse - yes I too do writefor the fun of it and I have had so far my articles published - maybe because I don't take life too seriously nor do I have to have a website -and even if I did, I would hope it would be interesting instead of yours which I am sorry to say is down right boring.
Having read what your web site represents I am more than confident you can take this on the chin.
If you can't improve then simply give up.

Well boys and girls, isn’t that a cheery little message to get on a Sunday afternoon? I know little about the Gulf....do they serve alcohol in Qatar?

Mrs. Collen can be reached at [email protected] if anyone should want to ask her where her articles have been published.

Some further information on Mrs. Collen from Antti. Apparently she is both a Scientologist and a hotelier. Quite obviously the animus is not motivated by my opinion of her skills as a hostess, as I have never mentioned them. Could be that she really doesn’t like the blog,  could be that I’m fairly scathing about the idiocy that is Scientology. Your choice, of course.

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Well risen above Mr. Tim :-).

Posted by: Sportin' Life | Aug 14, 2005 5:11:10 PM

Bad form, Tim! She may be a twit, but that doesn't justify publishing her e-mail address without anti-spam measures. In fact, opening someone's e-mail account to spam is a dastardly deed, and not worthy of Britain's most prolific blogger!

Tim adds: My email is published without anti-spam measures.

Posted by: Dan | Aug 14, 2005 5:50:40 PM

I assume her articles are not written in English!

Posted by: Lorenzo | Aug 14, 2005 6:39:36 PM

In case anybody was jumping to conclusions and looking for Gulf expats called Tim who read this site, I can categorically confirm that she is not my wife. Any wife of mine would post her comments in Russian.

BTW, you can drink in Qatar.

Posted by: Tim Newman | Aug 14, 2005 6:55:57 PM

According to Google she (and presumably her beloved Tim, too) has very much to do with scientology.

Posted by: Antti | Aug 14, 2005 7:04:58 PM

You can drink anywhere if you make your own hooch in cupboards.

But do Scientologists drink?

P.S. This only makes me even more worried about Katie Holmes.

Posted by: auntymarianne | Aug 14, 2005 9:49:14 PM


I think her message is quite sweet in its naivety.

As far as Mauritius is concerned? She may have a point. I have never been there but I am right now experiencing my second ever Mauritian lady love; having this once in life is an undeserved gift, twice? Even 25 years apart? You, dear reader, should be so lucky.

Tim adds: Right now? As you type? Impressive!

Posted by: Chris harper | Aug 15, 2005 1:12:50 AM

She's a scientologist and she thinks you need to take things less seriously?

Posted by: Scott Campbell at Blithering Bunny | Aug 15, 2005 9:04:34 AM

Tim adds: Right now? As you type? Impressive!

Man of many parts Timothy, man of many parts.

Posted by: Chris harper | Aug 15, 2005 10:09:49 AM

Had a 41 milli-second glance at her website where the scientology crap is held, and a further five second look at the hotel stuff. Don't know why she's moaning about a fairly standard blog-site, where the prime source of information and discussion are words, where the articles are placed to encourage debate, and if the reader disagrees with the author, he or she is given the riight to do so!

I could comment about the sickly salmon-pink background to her own website, or the slightly out-of-focus photographs, but that would be carping! I also could comment on the fact that no-one is allowed to disagree with scientology beliefs or doctrine, but I don't think she would be listening!

Mark her down as a 'don't know', Tim!

Posted by: Mike Cunningham | Aug 15, 2005 11:18:13 AM


Yeah, there's irony in a Scientology who uses a cooker-cooker web site created by their "church" criticising someone else's site.

Who knows, maybe if she reports you, they'll add your site to the filter the church installs in their own customised web browser which they give to their adherents, so they don't have to read any "suppressive" thoughts such as yours, Tim.


Posted by: Paul Moloney | Aug 16, 2005 10:59:10 AM

Haha, I am sorry for you Tim. This caroline lunatic woman is just a crazy cat lady with no time on her hands. Unfortunately she too decided to spam my inbox with "cheery" emails. I decided to do a search on her and lo and behold I found that she likes to spread her hateful joy everywhere and to everyone. Oh, update... she lives in saudi arabia and is having trouble getting laid.... this all makes sense now as to why she is so cold :)

Posted by: anti-idiot | Aug 7, 2011 3:21:44 PM

Anti -idiot I too know of Caroline Collen,having visited the Scientology part of the website,would anybody of a sane disposition publicise the fact that they believe in such drivel. I may be wrong but are their two Caroline Collens with husbands called Tim !.I was in close contact with Caroline Collen up until the end of July 2011 when I had a disagreement with the said Mrs Collen. She does indeed have two cats and lives in Saudi Arabia,and is prominent in the ex-pat community,having also been in close contact with her whilst she was in Qatar. I may be wrong but I had no idea that she was in to believing in Scientology, seems that she was led astray somewhat. She is a warm hearted soul deep down. Like you reason and logic are the only real directions to follow, being of a philosophical disposition myself. Interesting though all the same. Curiouser and curiouser. Brian Low

Posted by: Brian Low | Sep 12, 2011 10:03:24 PM