Tabloid Edition

Aaron Andrews video

Is there actually anywhere with an Aaron Andrews video? All the sites I can find are suggesting that I should be looking for an Erin Andrews video, but surely that spelling isn't correct, is it?

So where is this Aaron Andrews one? All I'm finding on the other search is people offering to infect my computer with a Trojan if I click on the link.

Surely, there must be somewhere with the right video, Aaron, not Erin, Andrews?

Joke explained here.

Cash for Clunkers suspended

I love watching car crashes like this. Cash for clunkers suspended.

The government designed a program to get car sales moving, thinking it would last till November.

The Great American Public took one look at it and stormed the dealers, meaning that the entire four month budget has now gone in four days.

And, umm, these are the people who are going to deliver national health care?

Darlene Haynes

Darlene Haynes appears to have been murdered by someone who wanted to take her baby. That's bad enough of course but what makes it worse is that Darlene Haynes had not in fact had her baby yet.

The body of Darlene Haynes was found dumped in a closet: the worst part of the story being that her abdomen had been opened and her unborn child removed. It is thought that the baby could have survived but would need medical attention.

Police are of course looking for who killed Darlene Haynes and the assumption is that whoever did either has the baby or has passed it on to another.

Yup, someone decided that they wanted her baby so badly that thy killed her for it and opened her up to take it. What might be evn worse is that that article has other examples of the same sort of thing happening.

Merce Cunningham

Merce Cunningham, one of the great dancers and choreographers of the 20th century as died, aged 90, at his home in Manhattan.

He started to dance late, at 18, but within two years he was a soloist for the Martha Graham company. He later set up on his own, the Merce Cunningham Dance Company and up until he was in each and every performance that the company gave.

He was pre-deceased, in 1992, by his life partner, the composer, John Cage.

His dance company put out this brief statement:

It is with great sorrow that we note the passing of Merce Cunningham, who died peacefully in his home last night of natural causes

Choosing where to have plastic surgery

I think we're all aware that plastic surgery is becoming more popular these days? Something which happens more often? It isn't just because people are unhappier than they used to be and thus want to change their looks: in fact, it's nothing to do with that at all. What's actually been happening is what happens to every medical procedure over the years.

Originally, when invented, it's hugely expensive and is the preserve only of the rich: as time passes techniques get developed and as they become more routine the price drops: to the point where just about anybody who saves a little can now afford plastic surgery.

Please also note that it's not all about looks nor is it just about larger breasts: one of the most popular surgeries is in fact breast reduction, something that might cure bad backs but isn't done for looks at all. A Tummy Tuck for example might be done for purely looks reasons: but might also be done to get rid of the evidence of having had a few children, something that can make some women deeply unhappy.

The real benefit of plastic surgery is to make you feel happier in your own body: might be larger, smaller, just differently shaped or even nipped and tucked a touch to smooth away the wrinkles of the years.

And yes, of course. you do want to travel to where you can be sure you're getting the best treatment by the best team. Which is why you might want to click through that link to see what Mya Cosmetic Surgery can do for you: you've already seen handsome examples of their work on Big Brother, X Factor and Shipwreck: but you'll have to click through to find out which those are.

Alexis Cohen's death: man arrested

Alexis Cohen, as many of us already know, was killed in a hit and run accident over the weekend.

For those who don't know, Alexis Cohen was a hugely popular failed contestant in American Idol: when Simon Cowell told her that she really wasn't cut out for the show she went into a beautiful expletive laden tirade and even at one point said "If I could legally moon you I would".

The police have, as is pointed out in this story about Alexis Cohen's death, arrested a man over that hit and run, looking to charge him with reckless driving and leaving the scene of an accident.

Finding a consumer justice lawyer

OK, so what is the thing that stops us from being ripped off by the large corporations? Yes, you've got it, the law, but we need to be active in it, not passive. That's why you might want, at some tme, a consumer justice lawyer. For example, say you were involved in a motorcycle accident, as a friend was. You'll need someone who knows all about the liability laws, about what the insurance company should be doing, who should be paying compensation and how much that should be: what about injuries, any long term implications?

We were lucky and found a lawyer who worked for us, not the corporations, who fought for our side and had a strong work ethic. Rather like, in fact, the lawyer you'll find if you click through that link.

Erin Andrews peephole tape torrent

Oh come on guys, this is getting ridiculous. The Erin Andrews peephole tape has been one of the leading search terms for well over a week now. Everyone who wants to see it must have seen it by now, haven't they?

More to the point, anyone who wants to see it and hasn't as yet isn't going to get to see it. For Erin Andrew's laywers are all over the internet, taking down sites that have the temerity to post it.

Which means, as you'll find out if you click that link above, that any site that claims to have it doesn't: they're just a front for people who are going to install a trojan in your computer.

Come on, give it up, stop searching for it. Go look up some good clean porn instead.

Insuring a van

We all know pretty much how to insure a car: you just pick up the phone and call the people with the nodding dog or the red phone (whichever way around those two go). Or log into a price comparison site and see where that takes you.

However, those mass market companies are pretty good when it comes to the mass market: but not when you come to anything more specialist. They'll almost certainly not have on offer what you actually want, at whatever price. So for things like van insurance you need to go to a specialist, like Autonet van insurance for example.

What's so special about van insurance you ask? Well, you see, you don't just want to insure the van. Yes, third party, fire, theft, comprehensive, all those sorts of things. But you'll also want goods in transit insurance (and, umm, no, that transit refers to movement, not a Transit Van) or at least you will if you're ever carrying goods for hire. Similarly, if it's your own work van you will want tool insurance: it's entirely possible (heck, with some trades, almost certain) that your tools will be worth more than the van.

If you've got a specialist vehicle, or one used for specialist purposes, then you're going to need a specialist insurer. Click through that link to find out more.

Why we should all insult Simon Cowell

Yes, yes, I think this is indeed a worthy cause. Why we must all insult Simon Cowell. No, no, it's not just because he's a man worth insuslting, nor because it's a moral duty to insult one such as he.

No, rather, because one of the more amusing American Idol tryouts of recent years was dissed by Cowell: and she then went right back at him, "egotistical", "smug" and other phrases of great truth.

Alexis Cohen (for it was she) was killed over the weekend by a hit and run driver.

That's the reaon we must all insult Simon Cowell: in memoriam, you see?

No, no, not because we just want to.....